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The VNR Accepts Cabinet Position in Trump-Vance Ticket as Secretary of Birthday Magicians, Silly String, and Giraffes

Article, Politics

Donald Trump, Gandalf, giraffes, gop, JD Vance, magicians, RFK Jr, silly string
GOP Announces Gun Reform to Stop Assassins Targeting GOP Presidential Candidates

Article, Business, Politics

Asshole, beta-cuck, Donald Trump, Elon Musk, gop, gun control, gun reform, guns
PCI Technology Enters Begrudgingly Critical Third Phase

Article, Business, Science

PCI, penis, tech, technology
Ask a Nut Butter Specialist: 10 Red Flags and How to Avoid Them, with Nut Butter

Article, Ask a Nut Butter Specialist, Editorial, Etiquette, Relationships and Romance, Society and Humanities, Staff Writers

almond butter, birds, cashew butter, crink-crink, dailyprompt, dailyprompt-2056, Eugene Levy, peanut butter, red flags, stink-stink
Sponsored Article: Have You Accepted the Prophet George Carlin Into Your Life?

Article, Promotional Content, Religion

cult, fuck you, fuck you. just be nice, george carlin, just be nice, rules
Haunted Garage Door Posts Rookie Murder Numbers

Article, interviews, Sports

garage, hell league
The VNR’s Best, Definitely-Real-Human of the Week: Aug 30, 2024

Article, Definitely Real Human Awards

Ayn Rand, beta-cuck, definitely-real-human, Q-Anon, Twitter
An Apology to Our Readers. We Got Scooped.

Apologies and Retractions, Article, Journalism and Ethics, Society and Humanities, Staff Writers

apology, breasts, crime, Glen Powell, Journalism, onn, Sydney Sweeney, the green lady, the onion
Summertime Inspirational Thoughts from Tantric Shaman Goddesses, Tiffany and Aaron

Article, Society and Humanities

goddess, goddesses, motivation, peanut butter, therapy, xenomorph
NASA Sends Baby Squid Into Space Preferring to Avoid the Term “Random Shit”

Article, Science

Bluntozorp, NASA, rich assholes, space
Ask a Nut Butter Specialist – Aug. 2024

Article, Ask a Nut Butter Specialist

cocaine, crink-crink, dailyprompt, dailyprompt-2026, Eugene Levy, Greta Thunberg, peanut butter
Men Ask: When Should I Start Masturbating on Office Zoom Meetings

Article, Business, Dumpster Fires, Society and Humanities

masturbation, White Poupon, work from home, Zoom
Brand Management Theory by 7y old Trevor McSchmedrickson

Article, pioneering child journalism, Relationships and Romance

brand management
Greta Thunberg Elected as Planet’s Lone, Responsible Adult

Article, Dumpster Fires, Politics, Society and Humanities

Greta Thunberg
Riding High on Fresh Wave of Hubris, Vidalia News Recorder Joins Twitter & Immediately Regrets It

Article, Dumpster Fires, Editorial, Society and Humanities

apology, Asshole, Journalism, Twitter